The concept behind MaleRoom is a valuable one that helps women gain more insight into the complicated psychology of men. There’s nothing easy about understanding the opposite gender, and Mindie Kaplan helps make that process a little more manageable. The process of interviewing three men on dating was an illuminating one, but not necessarily a completely honest process, as they were having a discussion with a woman and being filmed.
Carl seemed to be an experienced smooth-talker, while Trevor was a laid-back nature dude and Emerson seemed to sway on the sweet and nerdy side of the spectrum. When the group discussed the idea of playing hard to get, some answers were particularly revealing.
It seems that in the murky waters of dating, insecurity and vulnerability are two dominating emotions that are taboo to discuss, and hence lead to the genders playing games with each other. While men, by nature, do like embarking on a chase for a woman they desire, once they get that response, it can dampen the fire. This might be because that validation opens the door to vulnerability and emotion, something that a lot of men want to stay far away from.
The three responses on the idea of the chase seemed to vary based on maturity, as did the responses concerning sleeping together on the first date. The more mature men didn’t find sleeping together initially to be a dealbreaker, whereas Carl, the reformed bad boy, seemed to have a shorter attention span and the ability to only see a fast physical connection as a “one night stand.”
The conversation discussing the chase seemed to be mostly about the excitement and adrenaline, but it was quite interesting how most of the men agreed that there was a “sweet spot” within that chase, which seems pretty difficult for any woman to decipher. Many of the men agreed that they don’t like playing too many games, and even blamed some of the women for this game-playing. However, just in this single conversation with Mindie, they revealed their own games that they subconsciously play with women, whether they realize it or not, hence this “sweet spot.”
The panel did reveal some truths and miscommunications that go down between men and women, but the most important reveal was about how honest these men were being with themselves. When Mindie asked the guys to introduce themselves, she asked them to describe what type of guy they saw themselves as. When you see yourself a certain way, it can prevent you from seeing the wrongdoing and game-playing that you might be participating in without realizing it. We’d love a follow-up interview with women who have dated Carl, Emerson, and Trevor!